I’m there. I felt it coming on for a couple of weeks. The contraction before massive expansion. This is where people on the path of level up, leave or drop out.
In my body, I’m craving sugar or not eating all. My body feels like it’s being pulled apart and compressed by immense gravity all at the same time. Nothing like feeling like your cells are literally going to fly of in a million directions while feeling buried in quicksand.
In my mind, I’m telling myself:
“I don't belong.
I’m all alone.
No one gets me.
I should just stop teaching,
stop doing massage,
stop coaching people in health,
I should run away, move away, hide away forever.
Who am I?”
In my heart, I feel doubt & fear and I just wanna cry or blame or shut down.
But my soul, my spirit, is fully rejoicing. As if the angels, gods, and the heavens themselves are cheering me on.
I am about to expand.
I knew it was coming. I have been putting my energy into this expansion. I am not surprised and it is not the first time I have expanded in this ways.
Any time you make a big leap in any aspect of your life, it’ll shift and affect all aspects.
First, I started a big leap in my yoga practice by starting my first 1000-day meditation, everything shifted.
Then, I started big leaps into my health, everything shifted.
Now, I’ve been making big leaps in my business and everything is shifting.
I know my yoga & meditation practice has made me sensitive to the process. It removed the veils of mystery and now I have mindfulness or awareness of how this process works in me or on me. I have experience of how this process of contraction and expansion followed by contraction and then expansion again, happens and how it feels and how I can magnify it, slow it down or completely sabotage it all together.
Huge advantage? For sure, no doubt.
I am at choice.
Instead of being unconscious and simply feeling the victim to the thoughts and feelings and thus reacting to these uncomfortable growing pains with self-sabotage or numbing out completely; I get to be present. I get to learn the lessons that come in the transition. I get to use this experience to help other people when they get to this point in their expansion.
Let’s say, you've expanded. There’s a honeymoon phase where you can either use the energy to propel you to the next level or you can just coast on that energy and plateau for a while (you’ll have to work harder for the next expansion phase, but sometimes you just wanna enjoy for a bit).
Let’s say you're like me and you want to use that fuel to propel into a Level Up.
You use that energy to get more focused: health/business/relationships/what have you. You refine, you get clarity and you start taking action, lots of massive purposeful action.
Before you receive the fruits of this labor, before you reap what you just sewed, you will contract.
You’re energetically, cellularly, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically becoming the person who can handle the next expansion or next level.
This means patience and perseverance. It will feel lousy at first. In fact, it sucks. You'll want to stop and this is when most people quit.
But you're like the caterpillar soup about to become a butterfly; why back out now?
Lots of people drop out at this point.
They let “stressful events” be their excuse to go back to shitty eating patterns.
They let miscellaneous distractions cause them to forget to do their daily yoga or meditation practice.
They decide this project/side hustle/job is boring or not getting me the immediate results I want, I’m going to drop it.
But you if you don't, if you stick with it, you have the opportunity level up. You’ll expand. And then see how it was completely worth it and how it had to happen just in the way it did so that you could become this.
What do I do to keep going? I have an “Expansion Toolkit”
First, I’ve learned my signals.
Second, I access my tools:
That’s what I do every time I start to contract before the expansion.
So now over to you:
What are your tools to keep expanding?
What are your signs your contracting?
What steps are you taking right now towards your next big level up?
Share your experience in the comments below.